I wouldn’t say mine was a fire-and-brimstone childhood, but I lay awake plenty of nights awaiting the imminent wrath of a vengeful deity. Since then, the concept of judgment has always been top of mind.
When CourtTV launched in 1991, I’m pretty sure I was viewer #001. After years settling for preposterous murder mysteries and contrived courtroom dramas, I could finally play judge and jury with real cases in real time, rendering unassailable verdicts with a dismissive wave of the hand.
Today, I’m apparently as eager to dispense judgment as ever. Recently I spent an embarrassing amount of time watching the murder trial of a famous attorney in South Carolina. With a guilty verdict successfully obtained, and finally emerging from my grueling service as volunteer home juror, I came to an unsettling conclusion. Somehow I’ve become part of a global tribunal of smug, presumptuous Judgy-Judgersons who believe they can instantaneously and correctly discern motivations and determine guilt or innocence based on absolutely no direct knowledge or experience.
Outside the courtroom, when it comes to judgment, I doubt any of us is entirely guilt-free. Whether it’s a coworker, friend, family member or stranger, it seems no act or reaction, expression or gesture, fully escapes our analysis and opinion. Every hidden motive, every sublimated character flaw is crystal clear in an instant to our magical, truth-detecting eyes.
But thankfully, there’s an opposite world — it’s called long-term care.
Though it’s undoubtedly tempting sometimes, facility leaders and staff don’t get to be judges. Your job is to simply accept the people who need you and to treat them all the same — compassionately, attentively, expertly. You may want to, but you do your best to avoid analyzing their attitudes or questioning their motivations. You just deliver the care the best you can, without letting biases and assumptions crowd in.
This profession is a difficult one, but it can also be a refreshing oasis from a society gone crazy with judgment. It’s not perfect, but compared to a world so quick to marginalize or discard the vulnerable based on snap-impressions or groundless opinions, most facilities are an Eden of acceptance and grace.
Long-term care offers a beautiful respite, where every day is No-Judgment Day.
