Hope for old broads seeking sexual satisfaction

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Hey, does anyone out there remember my first blog? I mentioned sexuality in aging to get things started off? Well interestingly, a recent study by researchers at the Stein Institute for Research on Aging at the University of California (published in the online in the August edition of the Journal of the American Geriatric Society) showed that successful aging and positive quality of life indicators correlate with sexual satisfaction in older women.

So first of all, sexual satisfaction was not significantly associated with age. (Still, it can't be the same can it? OK, so maybe we old broads will be too old to remember what it was like to steam up windows and break furniture — like that's never happened to you — but perception is everything, right?)

And, the study also found that while the levels of sexual activity and functioning did vary depending on the woman's age, the perceived quality of life, successful aging and sexual satisfaction remained positive (Nice!). Oh, and get this: sexual activity, functioning and satisfaction with overall sex life was not significantly different between the three age cohorts studied (ages 60 to 69; 70 to 70; and 80 to 89).

No difference between 60 and 89! So this study tells us that many of us will maintain our ability to enjoy sex well into old age. OK, can I have a “Hallelujah!” 

So, a random thought: When this study hits the mainstream, will practitioners start advising elderly women be more sexually active as part of their health and wellness plan? I can see it now … Edith comes home to her hard-of-hearing husband and says, “Henry, I just got back from the doctor's office. So, do you want super sex?” “What?”

“I said, ‘Henry, Do You Want Super Sex?” “What?”

Big sigh from Edith.

“HENRY, DO … YOU … WANT … SUPER … SEX?” A light bulb goes on and Henry replies, “I'll take the soup!”

Oh, another bad thought … women outnumber men like crazy in their 80s and beyond, especially in LTC facilities. I can see it now: Little old ladies sneaking little blue pills into unsuspecting older gentlemen's nutritional supplements.

Then you'll have 90-year-old cougars going after those young and sexy 75-year-old guys. Or maybe major cat fights like the “Real Housewives of New Jersey,” as these rivals battle it out for last man (literally) standing. (Or hunched over on a walker … it doesn't really matter).

I can hear it now: “You stand right there, Lizzy! I'm gonna' snatch that blue wig right off your bald head!”

On second thought, I think I might just enter a convent.  I'll want to keep what hair I'll have left!

Just keeping it real (silly)

Nurse Jackie

The Real Nurse Jackie is written by Jacqueline Vance, RNC, CDONA/LTC — a real life long-term care nurse who is also the director of clinical affairs for the American Medical Directors Association. A nationally respected nurse educator and past national LTC Nurse Administrator of the Year, she also is an accomplished stand-up comedienne. She has not starred in her own national television series — yet.

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The Real Nurse Jackie

The Real Nurse Jackie is written by Jacqueline Vance, RNC, CDONA/LTC, a 2012 APEX Award of Excellence winner for Blog Writing. Vance is a real life long-term care nurse. A nationally respected nurse educator and past national LTC Nurse Administrator of the Year, she also is an accomplished stand-up comedienne. The opinions supplied here are her own and do not necessarily reflect those of her employer or her professional affiliates.

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