The Real Nurse Jackie

When physician observations cause pain

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A panel of doctors was asked for their opinions about a proposal for a new wing at the nearby referring hospital.

(With a nod to various fellow pun writers and apologies to all who have groaned to absorb such pun-ishment already.)

The Pathologists said, "Over my dead body."

The Pediatricians said, "Grow up."

The Plastic surgeons said, "The building needs a face lift."

The Podiatrists, however, said it was a step in the right direction.

The Allergists voted to scratch it.

The Dermatologists advised, "No rash moves."

The Psychiatrists thought it was madness.

The Radiologists could see right through it.

The Gastroenterologists had a gut feeling about it.

The Ophthalmologists thought it was short-sighted.

The Neurologists thought the administration had a lot of nerve.

The Obstetricians said they were laboring to come to a decision.

The Urologists felt it wouldn't hold water.

The Surgeons washed their hands of the whole idea.

The Anesthesiologists thought the idea was a gas.

The Cardiologists didn't have the heart to say no.

Why didn't they just ask the nurses?  We would have said, "Nurses are the foundation of any healthcare facility — and that's no joke."

Just keeping it real,

Nurse Jackie


The Real Nurse Jackie is written by Jacqueline Vance, RNC, CDONA/LTC, a 2012 APEX Award of Excellence winner for Blog Writing. Vance is a real life long-term care nurse who is also the director of clinical affairs for the American Medical Directors Association. A nationally respected nurse educator and past national LTC Nurse Administrator of the Year, she also is an accomplished stand-up comedienne. She has not starred in her own national television series — yet. 

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The Real Nurse Jackie

The Real Nurse Jackie is written by Jacqueline Vance, RNC, CDONA/LTC, a 2012 APEX Award of Excellence winner for Blog Writing. Vance is a real life long-term care nurse who also is the director of clinical affairs for AMDA - The Society for Post-Acute and Long-Term Care Medicine. The opinions supplied here are her own and do not necessarily reflect those of her employer or her professional affiliates.

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